Revis and Matticus Save the Kingdom Chapter 28

The adventure continues, on and on, and then on somemore, where we’ll stop noone knows. But, seriously, if you could tell us that would be great because I think we are lost… Anyway, pop on over to see where Revis and I head next on our quest to Save the Kingdom.

33 Grams of Blog

After they had spent precious time with their families, Matticus and Revis got back to work. They went over everything they had learned about what had happened while they were gone. Then, they went over it again. What they had learned was not much.

Jaded, and her sorcerer, had led an army of sparkly vampires to the castle. Without the leadership of the First Knight, the rest of the Kingdom’s warriors weren’t prepared to deal with the invaders. They put up a valiant defense, but were overmatched in the end. The Queen and Prince were flown out by Rara right before the castle fell.

Since then, the sparkly vampires had been slowly building up their numbers. Publically, the vampires had only replaced the army, and local law enforcement, with their own. Behind the scenes, however, they were moving their army around. When Grayson showed Revis a map showing where the…

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revis and matticus save the kingdom chapter 11

It took several minutes for the Jester’s vision to clear after the blinding explosion. When it was finally clear, he saw that Revis was standing over him. His knight’s lips were moving, but he didn’t hear anything that was being said. Gradually, the silence was replaced by a ringing noise.

“What did you do,” Matticus asked loudly, so he could hear himself over the ringing.

“I didn’t do that,” Revis answered. “For once, your silliness worked in our favor. If I didn’t have to come back and warn you about touching my things, I’d have been in that explosion.”

“How unfortunate,” came a voice from behind them. Turning, the two men saw the man who was leading the meeting, the man they assumed was the foreman, Len, standing there with a loaded crossbow leveled at them.

“Are you Len,” the Jester queried.

“Yes,” he replied. “Before we get to the rest of your Q & A, there’s something I have to do first.” Focusing on Revis, he added, “Sorry, but my orders are him alive, you dead.”

In the second it took for Len to aim, Revis used his ring to turn invisible. Len fired anyways. The crossbow bolt stopped in midair, followed by a grunt from Matticus’ knight. It fell towards the ground, stopping, with a thud, right before it hit. As Matticus watched, blood began to pool underneath the arrow.

Without thinking about what he was doing, Matticus yelled, “Futbol rules!” as he drew his sword from his scabbord and swung in one motion.  His flaming blade cleaved through Len’s crossbow and the foreman screamed in pain as the crushing blow shattered his fingers.  Broken and twisted, he held his hands in front of his face, his mouth flapping noiselessly, and he stumbled backwards until a tree stopped his progress.

Matticus levelled his sword, the flames rising in tendrils and licking out at Len, “Don’t move.”

Len’s gaze lifted from his fingers to the deadly serious expression flicking beyond the burning steel, and he nodded in understanding and agreement.

“Revis, are you still with us?”


Matticus wanted to cleave the foreman in two and be done with the man so he could focus all his energy and attention on his knight, but he needed Len alive.  He needed information from him he may not be able to get anywhere else.

“Revis, now would be a good time to let me know if you are alive or dead?”

A groan was the Jester’s answer, but that was enough.  He’d seen Revis pull through in impossible situations before, and he knew his knight certainly wouldn’t let anything like a crossbow bolt keep him from seeing his wife and child again. As if to prove his point, Revis suddenly let loose a stream of curses so long that Matticus was surprised he didn’t have to stop for air.

When Revis turned off his invisibility, the crossbow bolt could be seen sticking out of his right shoulder. He held up his hand, a hole right through it. “Apparently I can’t catch arrows,” he grunted as he pulled the bolt out with his uninjured hand.

Revis grabbed a vial out of his pack and quickly drank it. Len gasped in amazement as the Knight’s wounds healed before his eyes.

Nothing Revis did amazed him anymore, so Matticus ignored him and turned his attention back to his prisoner. “What was Jaded looking for here,” he demanded. “What is she after?”

“Isn’t it obvious,” Len retorted.

With a slap to the back of Len’s head, Revis interjected, “Just answer the question.”

“Fine,” the foreman sighed. “It’s you, Jester. What Jaded is after is you.”

Matticus took a step back, and his sword dropped from the foreman’s throat, “Me?”

Len watched the Jester back away and his eyes darted around hoping to see an opening to try and escape, but before he could remove his back from the tree, Revis unsheathed his own sword and pressed it firmly into his chest.

“Why is Jaded after Matticus?”

“Don’t you two have a brain between you?”  Len exasperatedly quipped.

While Revis was impressed with the foreman’s bravery, he pressed his blade a bit more firmly into Len’s chest.  His wounds may have healed with the potion, but he could still remember the pain and his mood certainly hadn’t improved.

“Okay, okay, okay.  If we capture the Jester, we will hold the heart and soul of the kingdom, right?  We can either bring him to our side, or we can use him to make sure the rest of his subjects do our bidding.”

“And, what is it that you want with the kingdom?”

Len didn’t answer immediately.  His legs had begun to tremble from the strain of having the point of Revis’ sword pressed into his chest, and the pain in his hands was reaching an intolerable level.

Matticus stepped forward again, sword still aflame, “Revis, if they can’t capture me directly…  What about the Queen and Little Prince?”

Emboldened by Matticus’ concern, Len taunted, “Is there anything they wouldn’t do for you Jester? Wouldn’t the Queen give up the Kingdom itself to keep you safe?”

Anger rose up inside of him. The thought that they would use him against his family made him step towards Len with murder in his eyes. Before he could act on those feelings, a blur passed in front of Len’s face. When it was gone, the foreman’s nose was bleeding and his eyes rolled back into his head. Len dropped to the ground, momentarily dazed. Matticus looked at his Knight with his eyebrow raised.

“He deserved that,” Revis answered the unspoken question. “Besides, I couldn’t let you kill him yet. We still need to find out where Jaded is and he can’t tell us if he has a flaming sword buried in his chest.”

Matticus shrugged and walked away to try to calm down. Revis slapped Len hard across the face. “Is your head working again yet,” he asked.

“You don’t need to keep hitting me,” Len complained.

“Until you answer my questions, I do. Just be glad it wasn’t my family you threatened. If I were Matticus, I’d take that sword, hold it up against your skin, and activate the flames. Then I’d repeat the process until either you told us what we want to know, or until your whole body was burned.”

A look of fear crossed Len’s face. “But he’s a jester. He wouldn’t do that.”

“You’d be amazed at what people will do to protect their family.”

“Fine, I’ll talk. Jaded isn’t paying me enough to take this kind of abuse.”  Len’s eyes flicked longingly towards Revis’ satchel, “Any chance I could get some of that healing potion?”

Revis curtly shook his head no.

Matticus, still fuming from the threat against his family but with enough rational thought having crept back in to not do anything too foolish, extinguished the flames on his sword first and then swung the blade through a thicket of long hanging branches.  He had to work off his anger and fear and if he didn’t lash out at a tree or two he wasn’t certain he could keep from attacking the foreman and then continuing on a berserk rage to wipe out every vampire and vampire supporter left on the island.

Len and Revis turned to watch the Jester hack away at the tree until Matticus was panting from the exertion and sat down amidst the pile of debris he had created.  The foreman had been tempted to say he wasn’t going to be able to think clearly enough to give Revis everything the knight wanted to know because of the pain coursing through his hands, but having seen Matticus outlet his fury, the foreman decided he didn’t need to play anymore games with the duo.

“You aren’t even asking the right questions,” he started.  “Jaded isn’t even who you are really after.  She is just a soldier in this war for the kingdom, like the rest of us.”

revis and matticus save the kingdom chapter 5

We hope you have been enjoying the story so far!  Any unexpected twists?  Any moments where you actually laughed out loud?  We’d love to hear all about it in the comments section.  And, Queen Creative were awesome enough to create some badges to go along with our stories.  They are on the bottom of both the Matticus and Revis sites.  If you earned one, help yourself.  If you just want one, help yourself too.  All’s fair in blogging and badges.  That’s a saying, right?
Anyway, on with the next chapter:

Blades crashed and stools and tables were reduced to splinters as the three jostled for position.  The regular patrons of the bar scrambled to safety and then quickly and orderly made their exits.  Matticus caught the civility of their departure from the corner of his eye and couldn’t believe what he was seeing.  Revis, caught their departure as well, but was more worried about the two who remained behind, the two where the light seemed slightly brighter around them.

The one vampire, with his superior strength and speed, was a good match for Revis and Matticus.  If the other two joined the fray, the Knight and Jester would easily be overrun.  Revis kept throwing glances in their direction as he parried and dodged.  Why weren’t they joining in?  Was it arrogance?  Did they think one of them should be able to handle the battle on his own?

Growing angry, Revis activated his magic ring and blinked out of sight.  Matticus had expected the ploy, and as the vampire turned to see where the Knight had vanished too, the Jester lunged forward and buried his blade in the vampire’s throat.  As the creature fell to the wooden floor, he slid the blade free and then removed its head with one swift motion.

He turned his attention to the two remaining vampires and waited for either them or Revis to make the next move. As he watched, he saw that two glasses of potent liquor began floating off of the bar. The glasses slowly made their way to the two vampires. By the time they noticed the floating glasses, the liquid inside was thrown over them. Using the back of their hands, the vampires tried to hurriedly wipe it out of their eyes.

When their vision was finally clear, they saw Revis standing directly in front of them, holding a lit candle in each hand. With a grin on his face, he put the open flame of the candles against their liquor soaked clothing. Both of the sparkly vampires erupted into flames. Since they now had more important things to keep their attention, it was easy for Revis and Matticus to each get behind one of them and take its head off.

Revis grabbed a pitcher of water off of the bar and began putting the fires out. “Let them burn,” Matticus huffed.

“Can’t,” Revis shook his head. “There might be clues on them. We need to search them.”

“Good point,” Matticus conceded as he began helping extinguish the pair.  “Though,” he mumbled, “I’m not sure why you torched them in the first place.  Revis and his theatrics.”


“Nothing, just complaining about these annoying vampires.”

Once the flames were extinguished, Matticus went to the door to stand guard while Revis quickly sifted through what remained of the vampires’ clothing.  They were both a bit surprised that an alarm hadn’t been sounded yet, but nothing about Bruges had gone as expected so maybe the regulars would just mind their own business and stop back by the bar the following day for a pint as if nothing had happened.  Still, neither wanted to teary longer than necessary.

Revis searched pockets and pouches, checked for tattoos and other distinguishing marks, trying to find anything that linked the vampires together or that would provide a clue as to who was behind them.  There was nothing obvious on either of the two burned ones so he went and searched the one that had attacked them to start the melee.

Matticus shuffled nervously by the door, occasionally cracking it open to peer out and make sure the street was still clear.  “Hurry up.  I don’t want to be here when the town guards show up.”

“Got something!” Revis excitedly called out just as Matticus picked up the sounds of marching feet coming down the cobblestone street.

“What is it,” he asked abandoning his post by the door.

“Uh, it probably would’ve been better if you checked on how close they were before you came over here.” After stuffing something into one of his pouches, Revis grabbed Matticus’ wrist and dragged him over to the wall. “Don’t move and don’t make a noise,” he warned the Jester.

A few seconds later, ten city guards burst into the room. The group spent a minute looking over the scene before their leader ordered them to search the surrounding area, giving his guards a detailed description of the pair. Matticus had a couple of questions he wanted to ask. On top of that list was: how had the guards not seen them? He turned to Revis, but he was invisible again. Looking down at where he still felt Revis’ hand on his wrist, he noticed that he couldn’t see himself, either. Apparently, Revis’ ring allowed him to make them both invisible as long as they were touching. Either that, or Revis just liked holding his hand…

Soon, the leader of the city guard was alone in the room, but it didn’t stay that way for long. A sparkly vampire walked in, displeasure clear on his face. “She won’t like this,” it said to the guard.

If Matticus and Revis could have seen each other they would have exchanged a glance then.  As it was, holding hands all, it was probably best they couldn’t see each other.  But they were both intrigued.  They had another clue to follow if they made it out of their current predicament.

Agitated, and obviously afraid, the guard retorted, “I’m well aware of that.  Don’t you have a way to find them?  Can’t you smell them out or something like that?”

The vampire cast a look of such venomous hatred that the leader of the city guard trembled visibly and then fled the bar.  The door slammed loudly behind him in his haste.  The vampire’s features relaxed when the man was gone and he flicked his shadowy eyes around the bar and sniffed loudly a couple times.  To the two hidden companions it almost looked as if he was trying to smell them out.

Matticus tensed, preparing to swing into battle, and he felt Revis do the same.  But then the vampire sneezed, wiped his nose, and made for the door.  As he exited, Matticus and Revis heard him say, “No, Jaded isn’t going to be happy about this at all.”

Revis let go of Matticus’ hand as soon as the sparkly vampire was out of sight. The Jester was about to ask his knight something, but Revis held up a hand to stop him. “Before we get into this, let’s go over one thing first.”

“What’s that?”

“I know we only did it to escape detection, but, if anyone asks, the hand holding never happened.”


“Ok, well, here’s what I found on that first vampire,” Revis proclaimed as he produced a rolled sheet of parchment, opened it up, and began reading.

“What does it say?”

“It’s all written in poetry form. Most of it is gibberish. It says something about “red wings” and “original six”, and “checking someone into boards”… whatever that means.”

“So it’s useless?”

“No. In between the gibberish are directions. I’m guessing that if we follow them, it’ll lead us to their base.”

revis and matticus save the kingdom chapter 4

Chapter 4 of the Revis and Matticus quest to save the kingdom is up over at 33 grams. Make sure you got check it out so you don’t fall behind in the story! Spoiler alert – El Guapo makes an appearance… What are you still doing here? Go. Read. Now!!

33 Grams of Blog

It took them a couple of days, but Revis and Matticus finally had the city of Bruges in sight. Matticus resisted the urge to jump up and down. That would be undignified, after all. He looked over and saw that Revis was deep in thought. Well, either that, or he had gas. It was hard to tell sometimes.

“Something on your mind,” the Jester asked.

“I’m trying to decide whether or not we should go in through the city gate, or sneak our way into the city.”

“Why wouldn’t we go in through the city gate?”

“We’re well known throughout the kingdom. If something out of the ordinary is going on around here, they’ll stop once word of our arrival spreads.”

Matticus thought it over for a minute. “True,” he replied, “but if we show ourselves openly, the sparkly vampires might panic. That could lead to them making mistakes.”


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it’s a living

The alley stank of filth, the castoffs of the dregs of society.  Litter spilled out of the trash cans.  Half-eaten globs of food were left in various states of decomposition across every surface they could stick to.  In places it looked like someone had intentionally smeared their waste on the wall.  It was not a place one would want to walk alone on a summer day in the height of tourist season.

It was winter, near midnight, and rain clouds blocked out the feeble light of the sliver of moon hanging onto the edge of the world.  It wasn’t raining, but it had, and it would again before the night was out.  The rain would wash the traces of spilled blood into the corners of the alley where it would go unnoticed among the trash.

He watched, hidden in the darkest depths of the alley, with eager anticipation as she stumbled out of the bar alone.  Her drunken faulty steps carried her across the street to pass in front of his alley, and he bent his will towards her, using the magic that was part of his nature to coerce her to enter.  It wasn’t a challenge.  Drunks never were.  Challenge or not, they tasted just as sweet either way when he was hungry, and he hadn’t eaten in days.

She barely paused at the entrance to the alley as he stripped away her last bit of control, and then her steps grew stronger, more certain, as he guided her through the detritus to where he waited.  She was young, and lovely, a true beauty among the humans.  She stood before him, no longer aware of anything, completely devoid of thought.

He reached out and gently tilted her head to the side, exposing her slender neck.  He gazed lovingly across the supple surface of his meal.  His fingers stroked the smooth skin and felt the flesh pulsing with the life beat flowing underneath.  Life for him.  Death for her.  His fangs sank deep.  His head exploded with rapturous joy as he tasted her.  He felt strength returning to his body and smiled, the upturned lips allowed a stream of blood to flow from his mouth and drip from his chin.

If it hadn’t been so long since his last meal he wouldn’t have needed to kill her.  He could have taken just enough to carry on, release her from the spell and send her back into the night.  But, it had been too long for him and once he started he could not control his thirst, his lust for her life’s blood.  When he finished, her corpse slumped to the ground at his feet, and he wiped the blood from his chin with his right hand and licked up the excess.

He could see the moon through the clouds.  He could hear the whispers of the humans in the neighboring buildings as the went about their boring lives oblivious to his existence.  He could smell their blood and while it called to him he’d had enough to regain some control over his needs.

Leaving the dead to rot in the alley, with his regained strength, he scaled one of the adjacent buildings, jumping from shadow to shadow as needed, and then hoisted himself onto the roof.  From there he jumped, changed into a bat, and walked the paths of air through the night in search of his next hiding spot.  It wasn’t the most glamorous lifestyle, especially compared to when he had lived like a king and been treated with the fear and respect he deserved, but times had changed and he had been forced to change with them.

Approaching his 2,000 year of life, he had been forced to adapt many times and it no longer bothered him as it once had.  Perhaps one day the humans would wage a war that would decimate their numbers and capabilities and then he’d walk among them as a god again.  He could be patient for that likely eventuality.

With the taste of his last victim’s blood still in his mouth, he knew for the time being that he had all he ever really needed anyway.


Written as a thank you to The Cutter for helping me reach this major milestone.   He requested/said: “I’d like to see more stories from the vampire’s point of view. (And cool vampires like in the old days, not the whiny vampires in tween lit like Twilight)”

Well, how did I do?


Are you a faithful kingdomite?  Do you have a request?  Let me know in the comments and I’ll see what I can put together for you.  (And for all those who already have their requests in, don’t worry, I have them all written down and I’m already working on them.  Your posts are coming.)