I’m starting to get bruises

You know what happens when the world famous Zombie Killing Rogue Ninja (and First Knight of the Matticus Kingdom) tags you?

You get bruises.

Big ones.

Revis doesn’t have an “easy” setting.  He doesn’t know how to politely tap you on the shoulder and say, “Pardon me, good sir, but I do believe you are now ‘it.'”  No, no, no.  With him it’s all stealth mode, surprise attack, sword brandishing, mayhem bringing, full on ferociousness, without so much as a “How do you do.”

I was helpless to withstand that kind of onslaught…

So, I find myself “it” again…  (Oh, the horror, the horror!)

“And… here… we… go…:”

1. Post these rules.
2. Post a photo of yourself and eleven random facts about you. 
3. Answer the questions given to you in the tagger’s post. 
4. Create eleven new questions and tag new people to answer them.

5. Go to their blog/Twitter and let them know they’ve been tagged.


1. Done, done, and done.

2. Photo?  No.  Facts?  Ugh, okay…
a. My lucky number is 13.
b. I have a Manchester United jersey that has my name and #13 on it.
c. I look forward to Friday’s that happen to fall on the 13th day of the month.
d. I’m pretty sure I’ve only seen the first of the Friday the 13th series of movies.
e. I got married on the … 18th day of the month.  (You thought I was going to say 13th, didn’t you?  Silly, silly.)
f. The little prince was born on the ….25th day of the month.  (Fooled you again!  Neener, neener, neener.)
g. I don’t have any other #13 stories, sorry.
h. I’ve climbed Mount Whitney 2 times.
i. I have a 35 mile (one way) commute to work.
j. I know why all the other numbers are afraid of #7.  (It’s because 7 ate 9.)
k. I like to stick with themes when answering things like this.  Had you noticed?

3. Questions from Revis and my answers.

  • What movie quote do you use the most?  Seriously?  Of all the movie quotes I use you want to know which one I use the most?  You are really asking me to go through them all and choose one?  I ….  I don’t think I can do that.  But, I’ll do this for you instead:  When camping or backpacking I use, “That’s not a knife,” from Crocodile Dundee the most.  When talking to my brother I use “It’s possible, pig,” from Princess Bride the most.  When trying to make sense of this world I use, “Deserves got nothing to do with it,” from Unforgiven the most.  When just being my silly Jester self I use, “May the Schwartz be with you,” from Spaceballs the most.  When I don’t know the answer to a question I use, “Who knows such things, only the Oracle,” from the Matrix the most.  When heading off on an adventure I use, “Now bring me that horizon,” from Pirates of the Caribbean the most.  I’m going to stop there… but, you get the idea anyway.  Plus, frequent visitors to the kingdom should already be familiar with my Friday Q and A movie quoting madness…
  • Will you go visit MissFourEyes and ask her about her bowel movements for me?  Done.  http://missfoureyes.wordpress.com/about/  But I have no idea why.
  • Did you actually read all of my answers up there?  Um…. no.
  • Did you actually learn anything about me from them?  Yes.
  • What should I know about you that you don’t think I already know? I forgot to mention in my list of geekiness that I won a science award and competed in math tournaments in junior high…
  • If you could pick a theme song for your blog, what would it be?  Depending on the day, I’d probably want to switch between Solar Stone – Seven Cities, Crystal Method – Name of the Game, Bruce Springsteen – Blood Brothers, and Foo Fighters – Home.
  • Did you like the picture of me that I put up?  Not really.
  • What’s worse: someone loudly telling you that they farted in public, or them not telling you and the smell blindsides you?  Being blindsided is always worse.
  • Can you start giving me money so I can quit my job and blog full-time?  No.
  • I know I asked this in one of my RTotD posts, but I really want to know: Why are Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands considered international even though they’re part of the U.S.?  If we knew the answer to that question they’d have to lock us up.
  • You’re walking with a friend at a local store. Your friend starts to scratch their crotch in a very obvious manner. How do you react?  Ask, “Hey, you need a hand with that, or do you have it under control?

4. Questions for the people I’m going to gentle tap on the shoulder… I’m too beat up to do more than that anyway:

1.  If the world were being overrun by zombies, what would be your weapon of choice, and why?
2.  Would you have rather been Butch Cassidy or the Sundance Kid, and why?
3.  Which superhero movie is your least favorite, and why?
4.  What movie can bring you to tears without fail?
5.  Have you ever said, “Oh captain, my captain” to someone?
6.  If you answered “yes” to #5, why did you do it?  If you answered “no” to #5, do you at least know the reference?
7.  If you answered “no” to #5 and “no” to #6, what is your favorite Robin Williams movie?  Otherwise, what is your favorite Mel Brooks movie?
8.  If you gave your favorite Mel Brooks movie in answer to #7, what is your favorite Robin Williams movie?  If you gave your favorite Robin Williams movie in answer to #7, what is your favorite Mel Brooks movie?
9.  Did you see what I just did there?
10.  If you were stranded on a desert island, with a movie player and a big screen TV, and you could only have one movie from each of the following genres, which ones would you want with you?  Drama?  Western?  Comedy?  Action?  Thriller?
11.  Have many of these questions had nothing to do with movies?

5.  I will accomplish this task through the magic of pingbacks.  Look out, you’ve been tagged!

These first three I’m tagging because they tagged Revis, who in turn inflicted this pain on me, so I’m holding them responsible:

Miss Four Eyes

The rest I’m tagging because they are awesome and I want to see their answers to my silly questions (Okay, okay, Twindaddy, Alice, and Miss Four Eyes are all awesome too, and I want to know their answers too, but I wanted to point out that all of this is their fault.  So feel free to blame them as well in your posts.):

AR Neal

taggy tag tag

I was tagged again!!!  How does that keep happening?  I thought I had taken myself out of the game, retired, as it were, from the schoolyard antics of my past.  Alas, I guess I never get to actually retire, do I?

That’s okay.  I love playing games.  And tag was always one of my favorites!  Cheers to being forever young (at heart if nothing else).

MerBear tagged me.  Have you been knocked over by a feather recently?  I highly recommend it.

She didn’t just tag me though.  She full on hit me… sent me sprawling in the dirt…  I think it’s because I owe her a cup of coffee.  I made her spit hers out once, I think it was something I said, and she’s never forgiven me for that.

Part of her tagging me, was slapping me with these rules:

1. Post these rules. 
2. Post a photo of yourself and eleven random facts about you. 
3. Answer the questions given to you in the tagger’s post. 
4. Create eleven new questions and tag new people to answer them.

5. Go to their blog/Twitter and let them know they’ve been tagged.

1. Done.

2. A photo?  Of me?  Nobody wants to see that.  In any case, how about a game within a game – I’ve already posted a couple pictures of me out in the kingdom, go forth and find them if you dare.  And eleven random facts too?  These rules are already starting to get on my nerves.  I think I’m going to skip this one.  Neener, neener.

3. MerBear’s questions for me and my answers:
1. What’s you’re favorite color?  Blue.  (I think it’s funny that I’m purposefully typing the word “Blue” in red.)
2. What is you’re worst vice?  Being perfect.
3. Have you ever wished upon a star?  Of course!
4. Do you like the sound of you’re voice?  Live, yes.  Recorded, no.
5. Do you agree that pudding is awesome?  Chocolate pudding, yes.  I don’t recognize any of the other “options.”
6. If not, why???  n/a
7. Can you touch you’re tongue to you’re nose?  Not anymore.  I sucesfully did this once when I was much younger.  Since then every subsequent attempt has been met with utter, soul crushing, failure.
8. Can you burp the alphabet?  Sadly, no.  It’s one of the greatest regrets of my life.
9. Do you like the smell of fresh cut grass?  No.  But, only because I associate the smell with the itchy feeling I get after playing in fresh cut grass.
10. Do you feel bad that I am struggling to come up with these last couple questions?  Nope.  Suffering is part of the game!  Muahahahahahahaha.
11. How often do you wash you’re hair?  At least once a day.  (Every morning.  If I go running or do some other outside activity at some point during the day I take a second shower before going to bed and more often than not will wash my hair again.  What few hairs I have left.)

4. My questions and the people who must answer them or face the consequences:

1.  What movie quote do you use most often?
2.  Who is your current favorite actor or actress?
3.  What “summer blockbuster” are you most looking forward to?
4.  What is one of the movies you have been most disappointed by after waiting eagerly for its debut?
5.  Who is your current least favorite actor or actress?
6.  Why?
7.  What is one book you’ve read recently that you would like to get seen made into a movie?
8.  Who would you cast into the main roles?
9.  Why?
10.  Do you have a book that you love that you hope never gets made into a movie?
11.  If so, what is it and why?  If not, congratulations, you don’t have to to do anything else.

I haven’t had a chance to get out and meet a bunch of new people recently, the little prince as been taking up most of my previous blogging time.  So, I’m going to have to tag the people who are normally hanging around the kingdom:

(Aunt) Princess Rosebud
The Imaginator
Matrone Bell
Not Quite Alice
Lady Lovely

5. I accomplished this task through the marvel of pingbacks.  I’m awesome like that.  You can reach out and touch me if you want.  I probably won’t bite…

TAGGED again

KnowledgeKnut tagged me!  We are back in the schoolyard again.  And I’m okay with it.  I always liked tag.  In the scouts we played a slightly nastier version of the game called “Ditch-em.”  In the polite versions of that game those who weren’t “it” just completely disappeared making it impossible to be found and tagged.  In the less polite versions of the game we set up tricks and traps for those chasing us.

A visual representation of the current game:


For some reason I feel like Uncle Sam is pointing in my direction…  Anyone else feel that way?  Hmm, either Uncle Sam or maybe Smokey the Bear.  Speaking of scouts I can’t remember how many times we almost burned down something…  but, that’s another story altogether.  Let’s get on with the game, shall we?  We shall…


  1. Post these rules
  2. Post a photo of yourself (if you want to) and eleven random facts about yourself
  3. Answer the questions given to you in the tagger’s post.
  4. Create eleven new questions and tag new people to answer them.
  5. Go to their blog/twitter and let them know they have been tagged.

– 2 – Eleven random facts about me:
1. I’m feeling a bit odd today.
3. Did I mention the scouts?  Yeah, I’m an eagle.
5. I definitely think rules are meant to be stretched to the limits.
7. I only almost accidentally burned down my house once.  It involved fireworks.  I was in junior high.
9. I’ve posted a few pictures of me in some of the previous games of tag I was pulled into.  If you are feeling less lazy than me, you can search for them and, er, um, check me out.
11. It’s not that I’m lazy so much as that I’m not getting a lot of sleep these days.  The little prince isn’t yet on any sort of discernible schedule.

– 3 – Questions from KnowledgeKnut and my answers:

1.  If you could spend time with someone who inspired(s) you, who would that be?
My maternal grandfather.  (Mom, I’m not just saying that to see if I can get you to cry.)

2.  Why?
He was an amazing man… and if half of the memories I have of him, and half of the stories I’ve heard about him are true at all, he was more than an amazing man.  I never got to spend much time with him when I was old enough to appreciate the wisdom and experiences I could get from him.  I’d love to have that opportunity now.

3.  If you could be the opposite sex for one week, what would you do?
I plead the fifth.

4.  What is your dream car?
I’m not really a car guy.  If had the money I’d probably buy a corvette…

5. What is something you’ve always wanted to say to someone but never had the nerve?
I’m sure there have been things, but I don’t remember them.  For the most part I try to speak my mind.

6.  When you forgive someone, can you forget?

7.  If you could be any Royal (dead or alive), who would you be?
Me.  The Jester of the Matticus Kingdom.  Duh!

8.  Why?
Because being the Jester is total awesomesauce.

9. Your favorite movie has became your reality, what is the movie and what part are you playing?
Too many choices…. too many…. too… *beep* sorry, you have fried the Jester’s brain (nice going there wiseguy), please bear with us as we try to get things up and running again…. *beep*

If they ever make the Dark Tower series into a movie (or 7… or 14…).  I would be Roland Deschain of Gilead. 

10. Your goal is to become famous, how do you plan to do that?
With the wordiness of my wordy words, of course.

11.  When you are gone (dead) what is the one thing that you want to remembered for?
My wordy words.  Didn’t we just cover that?

– 4 – Questions and people I’m tagging:
1. Coke or Pepsi?
2. Why?
3. Mac or PC?
4. Why?
5. Tastes Great or Less Filling?
6. Why?
7. Why is the answer to life, the universe and everything “42?”
8. Pen or pencil?
9. Why?
10. Manual or automatic?
11. Why?

(Thanks to my brilliant wife who helped me come up with this list of questions.  She is AMAZING.)

You’ve been tagged:
1. Jon
2. Jen
3. MerBear
4. Steph
5. Tony
6. (Aunt) Princess Rosebud
7. The Imaginator
8. The Scribbler
9. Mr. Atheist
10. Matrone Bell
11. Rara
12. Jenn
13. The Foodie Farmer

Each of these wonderful bloggers has guest blogged for me in the last couple of weeks, picking up the slack around the kingdom while my efforts have been focussed elsewhere.  And how do I repay them?  I tag them, of course!  Don’t you wish you had guest blogged for me too??!!

Of course you do!

back in the schoolyard again

NotQuiteAlice snuck up and tagged me!

The nerve, right?  Well, she spends most of her time taking trips down into rabbit holes, so I guess we can’t be expecting too much more in the way of manners, can we?!  I mean, we all remember the tea party incident – there were cups and mugs and glasses shattering every which way, tea sloshing all over the place, spoons and forks in all the wrong places, and suger everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE!

Oh, sorry, got off topic there for a bit.  Being “it” makes me cranky.  (Or was that “crazy?”  I forget…)  Onward then:

1. Post these rules.  (I’m thinking we can go ahead and check this one off, agreed?)
2. Post a photo of yourself and eleven random facts about you.
3. Answer the questions given to you in the tagger’s post.
4. Create eleven new questions and tag new people to answer them.
5. Go to their blog/twitter and let them know they have been tagged.

Holy High Pressured Rules, Batman!  That’s a lot to do just to no longer be this “it” thing everyone keeps talking about.  Maybe I should just want to be “it.”

Alas, I was never very good at that…

I owe someone this shirt...1) I’m not very good at math.
3) That’s actually not true at all.  I won awards for math in junior high.
4) I won a science award t0o.
5) I still have the headphones from this picture.
6) I like to quote movies.
7) What do you mean you arleady knew that?
8) I skipped 2?  I never liked it anyway.
9) Anybody who wants to is welcome to guest post on the Matticus Kingdom.
10) I’m not above shameless self promotion.
11) I think I should start wearing blue shirts again.

1. Why is 6 afraid of 7? – Because 7 ate 9?  That’s too simple.  I think it’s because 7 is trying to take over the world: same thing it does every night.
2. Pluto, do you still think he’s a planet? – I thought Pluto was a dog?
3. Any car in the world.. no money restrictions, what is it? – 96 Mazda B2300 – what can I say, I love my truck.
4. What happens when you mix those 2 chemicals on your left over there together? – It creates an odorless, flavorless compound known as Iocane Powder, one of the deadliest poisons in the world.
5. Sherlock or the Brain? – Sherlock.  Thought I’d have picked Pinky if he was an option.
6. Why? – Because the Brain is insane!!  Pinky was the genius. 
7. Black Keys or 3 Days Grace? – Black Eyed Peas or 311?  Um, um, um…  Bruce Springsteen?  Foo Fighters?  Green Day?  Tiesto?
8. Where did I leave my car keys? – In your pocket.
9.  Why were my keys there? – So that the brain couldn’t find them for use in his next attempt to take over the world.
10.  What is the Hokey Pokey really all about? – It actually started as a scheme by Brain to create a dance, like a rain dance, but the Hokey Pokey was supposed to be so powerful he could get all the humans linked together and doing it at one time, distracting them from his run for President where he would put actions into motion that would lead to total global domination.  Luckily, Pinky saw where it was all headed and managed to thwarts Brain’s plan.
11. If Gambit married Rogue, what powers would their kids have? – Sexy poker skills.


…..     TAG!!!     …..

You’re it:

1) What is the funniest movie you’ve ever seen that wasn’t supposed to be a comedy?  (MST3K movies don’t count.)
2) What is the least funny movie you’ve ever seen that was supposed to be a comedy?
3) Is there a line, for you, where one side the comedy is genius, and the other side is “too far?”
4) If you ever said, “Hey boys, lookie what I got here,” what would you have?
5) Can you ever see yourself crushing on Mongo?
6) Why are you SO tired?
7) Where are all the *ahem* women at?
8) If you could send a telegram, who would you send one to and what would it say?
9) Who would you want to choreograph your dance routine?
10) If you could ride off into the sunset, would you pick a limo to do it in? Or…?
11) Would you ever ride a horse on a blazing saddle?

Please see the links in section #4.

Phew!  Feels good to no longer be “it.”