He stumbled in, reeking of the 3 he’d already visited that night, “I’m doing a Halloween pub crawl!” His words were amazingly clear despite his obvious drunkenness. The other patrons glanced over their drinks to glare at the man who shattered their silent revelry of dark thoughts.
He slammed his wallet, soggy from the night’s travels, on the bar. Sighing, the bartender stepped down the length of the counter, “What’ll you have?”
“A Zombie!” He laughed in reply, grinning too widely.
“A Zombie?
“That’s right, it’s a rum drink with…”
“I know what it is,” the bartender turned his back on the man to grab the necessary bottles and put his mixing degree to work. Who goes out on Halloween to get drunk on novelty drinks? He could understand the rest of his customers, loners who wanted to avoid the door to door tyrants reminding them of the families they didn’t have. But they just quietly sipped on their beers and waited until it was safe to return home.
The drink complete, he turned back to the drunk and pushed it across the bar, “Here you go. That’ll be $7.50.”
He pulled out a damp ten dollar bill, “Keep the change.” Then he refolded the wallet, stuffed it back into his pants pocket, and lifted the drink, “Cheers! And may the spooks and ghouls of the evening leave you be.” With that, he tilted back the drink and poured the concoction down his throat in one go.
He stood from his stool, even more wobbly than he had been when he walked in, and stumbled to the exit. “Don’t let the night get you down. The spirits can’t get you if you are happy.” Then with a little wave he pushed the door open and disappeared.
The parting message gave the bartender goose-bumps but he had forgotten the whole thing ten minutes later. The voice came from behind him as he was locking up, “I’m one of the ghouls. Now, where’s my smile?”
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….Word Count: 333
Written in response to this week’s Trifecta Writing Challenge:
- Your response must be between 33 and 333 words.
- You must use the 3rd definition of the given word in your post.
- The word itself needs to be included in your response.
- You may not use a variation of the word; it needs to be exactly as stated above.
- Only one entry per writer.
- If your post doesn’t meet our requirements, please leave your link in the comments section, not in the linkz.
- Trifecta is open to everyone. Please join us.
I love this! Many of my favorite elements: alcohol, Halloween, slight demonic twist.
A trifecta of goodness for the Trifecta challenge. 😉
Impeccably written with an ending that one can feel won’t disappoint -and doesn’t! Nice one.
Thank you for the praise. Glad you enjoyed it! 😀
Poor bartender; didn’t he ever pay attention to the movies?
Awesome twist, cool idea.
Yes, there are so many lessons we can learn from movies, including: don’t ever say, “I’ll be right back.” 😉
Nice finish! Bet the bartender feels stupid now…
I’m not sure he feels anything anymore…
“he other patrons glanced over their drinks to glare at the man who shattered their silent revelry of dark thoughts.” is my fav line in that.
There was more to that, too. But, I had to cut some stuff out to get it down to 333 words. Glad you liked it!
Nice!
Thanks!
NICE. 🙂
Thank you!
See, a smile saves! Nice spooky story!
Never underestimate the power of a smile. 😉 Glad you liked it.
This is beautiful narration, DJ. liked it 🙂
Thank you!
I’m confused…was the customer some sort of ghoul, or was this someone else?
It was the customer who returned at the end… ghoul has many meanings, just as Zombie does. 😉
Ok, I get it…I think
Well, that makes one of us, becuase now I’m confused.
Love the ending…oooooo spooky 😀
Thanks!
scary ending, never forget to watch your back )
And, more importantly, always have an exit buddy. 😉
Excellent ending!
Thanks! 😀
Few things spook me. This does.
Hooray? I think… I guess, happy to hear my writing was compelling, but sorry to have spooked you.
Poor bartender. He has to listen to all sense and nonsense.
Very true! Thanks for reading and commenting.
I loved this so much! A perfect blend of creepiness and rum-just the way I like it! Ghoulishly good writing!
Thank you! 😀
haha creepy!
😀 Thanks!
I think I’ve even met this patron before. A nice image. Oh, and a creepy twist.
Thanks! Before the zombie ordering patron! Unless they tip well, then I’m sure they are fine…
The end was great – “where’s my smile?”
Thank you. 🙂
I suppose if the bartender didn’t have a smile then, the ghoul would have one later, eh? Good stuff!
I’m pretty sure this particular ghoul is always smiling. 😀
I’ve always been terrified of ghouls. Probably because I don’t know exactly what they are, but I assume they eat human flesh. Creepy.
I think that’s more of a Goblin thing. Ghoul, in my mind, is just anything or anyone that is up to no good in a distorted, ugly, sort of way. The dirty underbelly of your every day miscreant.