Q and A parody (take 2)

This is the second installment in a new series of parody posts that I started earlier this week with some humorous lyrics.

Over the years I’ve incorporated an abundance of movie dialogue into my day to day lingo.  The following is a useful guide parody I’ve put together of situations you may find yourself in and the some (in)appropriate and/or completely silly responses.

You probably shouldn’t ever use these.*  However, I have.  Every.  Single.  One.

Q: What do you say when someone asks why you did something foolish?
A: “It’s like this fellow I knew in El Paso.  One day, he just took all his clothes off and jumped in a mess of cactus.  I asked him that same question, ‘Why?’ … He said, ‘It seemed like a good idea at the time.'”
– Vin – The Magnificent Seven

Q: What do you say when you see someone driving a super flashy car?
A: “Where does he get those wonderful toys?”
– The Joker – Batman

Q: What do you say when someone questions your coolness?
A: “I’m with it.  I’m hip.”
– Dr. Evil – Austin Powers

Q: What do you say when you are about to avenge the death of your father, who you loved very much?
A: “Hello.  My name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.”
– Inigo Montoya – The Princess Bride

Q: What do you say when you want to happily respond in the affirmative?
A: “Oh, it’s twue.  It’s twue.  It’s twue, it’s twue!”
– Lily Von Shtupp – Blazing Saddles

Q: What do you say when you realize you don’t need to worry about something as much as you were?
A: “Oh, good.  For a moment there I thought we were in trouble.”
– Butch Cassidy – Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

Q: What do you say when a situation is under control but people keep asking who is taking care of it?
A: “We have top men working on it now. …  Top… men.”
– Major Eaton – Indiana Jones and The Raiders of the Lost Ark

Q: What do you say when you are at a social event and someone playing the bagpipes has had too much to drink?
A: “We have a piper down, I repeat, a piper is down!”
– Stuart Mackenzie – So I Married an Axe Murderer

Q: What do you say when someone asks your name?
A: “There are some who call me… Tim.”
– Tim – Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Q: What do you say when someone has done a good job?
A: “That’ll do, Donkey.  That’ll do.
– Shrek – Shrek
A: “That’ll do pig.  That’ll do.”
– Farmer Hoggett – Babe

“Harriet, sweet Harriet..”

What do you mean you’ve never been to a social event that had a bagpiper who drank too much?  We’ll you’re missing out.

Bonus question – how many Mike Myers references did I make?

This, along with the previous installment, are by no means complete lists, but they should be enough to get you through most of life’s experiences.  Well, I’ve found them useful anyway.


*The Matticus Kingdom published this list for entertainment purposes only.  We do not dispense with advice we think people should ever heed and cannot be held responsible for any resulting slaps across the face, puzzled looks, loss of friends, or other unpleasantness that may result from following these guidelines.  Proceed at your own risk, here there be monsters.  Insert additional typical “hold harmless” verbiage here.  I’ve been known to joke about my legalese sections self-destructing but am not feeling that silly today.

37 thoughts on “Q and A parody (take 2)

  1. I am not counting the references, I just love that one movie so much. Now, I am going to order a large cappucino, get some KFC and try to think of something to write on my own blog. While I appreciate the creativity of your post, that is too much to expect of me at the end of the work week.

    • No way I could have come up with that this morning (only 7:30 here in CA). I been working on it all week and put the finishing touches on it yesterday. Definitely more than I could have handled here at the end of the week too.

  2. I never realized I was quoting a movie line, but I always say that my epitaph will read “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” Most of my ideas do.

    Did you see the news story about the airline passenger who was asked to change his shirt because it had the Inigo Montoya quote and some of his fellow passengers felt threatened?

    I’ve considered making viewing The Princess Bride and Office Space as pre-requisites for any communication with me.

    • I may have taken that college class… Hmm, no that was just a physical comedy in film class. My final was a ten page paper on the physical comedy in Monty Python movies… I got an A. 😀

      • I believe you did! Anyone who quotes the Princess Bride deserves an A. I use that quote all the time, even to people who don’t get it, it is still funny.
        Thank you again!!

      • Wait! People who don’t get it? They don’t get because they haven’t seen the movie? They don’t get it because they’ve seen the movie but don’t understand the context in which you are quoting it? Either way: INCONCEIVABLE!

      • I’m not sure that I do… (I actually have post written and waiting to publish in my dashboard where I question that very thing… though I’m asking it about “snarky” rather than “inconceivable.)”

      • Can’t wait to read it because I have honestly never used the word “snarky” in a sentence. I have nothing against it, but I have never used it. I will break that trend today.

    • Oh! So close. I’m giving you full credit though, because I threw in the 4th one specifically to trick people up. Technically, though, there are only 3 Myers movies referenced, yes.

      • It’s all good. Your meaning was understood, so you probably are smarter than you think you are… hmm, that’s a weird thing to say. Or is it? I’m not really sure anymore. My brain has stopped working properly as this Friday drags on.

    • “Head! Pants! Now!” It’s one of my all time favorite movies and it took a while to pick the one quote I wanted to use from it (and I ended up throwing in a second one anyway). Hooray, you found all 4 references! Great job. You win the prize of getting to say “Matticus thinks I’m awesome” for the rest of the day.

  3. I’m not perfectly sure about the Mike Myers quotes..thought it should be three?

    I also like to quote from movies from time to time but then in German. The first ones getting to my mind right now are from Highlander ..just checking how they are in English .. “It’s better to burn out than to fade away ..”

    and the one “Gewagte Frisur!” we use quite a lot *smile* ..

    ok, I’ve found it – McLeod to Kurgan: “Nice to see you Kurgan. Who cuts your hair?”

    ..and many more.
    I even think Highlander is the movie we use the most quote from .. still .. 🙂

  4. Love this. I’ve always wanted to nail quotes like this, but they always come to me five minutes too late. Now I can be prepared. I might even go hunt down a party with someone playing the bagpipes just to use the line. I could double up if there was also someone with a big head. “It’s like an orange on a toothpick.”
    ” Now that was offside, wasn’t it? He’ll be crying himself to sleep tonight, on his huge pillow.”

    • “It’s like sputnick!” So good!! Look at you go, pulling out even more great lines! If you find a good party with some pipers, let me know and maybe I’ll head over too.

    • I’ve found them handy… Now I just need to write something original and catchy so that others will go around quoting me. That would be legen… wait for it… dary. Oh, that one’s already taken? Drat!

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