Even More Q and A Parody Madness

You are all familiar with the madness now, right?

It started here and made its way over here before popping up last week here.

And I’m starting to wonder how many more posts I can get out of this idea!

Anyway, here we go again:

Over the years I’ve incorporated an abundance of film dialogue into my day to day lingo.  The following is a useful guide parody I’ve put together of situations you may find yourself in and the some (in)appropriate and/or completely silly responses. 

You probably shouldn’t ever use most of these.*  However, I’ve used many of them and the rest I’m just waiting on the perfect opportunity.

Q: What do you say when a conversation has gone so far off topic you just need to stop and start over?
A: “Zed’s dead, baby.  Zed’s dead.”
- Butch (Bruce Willis) – Pulp Fiction

Q: What do you say when someone suggests something that definitely isn’t PC and you don’t care?
A: “I’m strangely comfortable with it.”
- Connor (Sean Patrick Flanery) – The Boondock Saints

Q: What do you shout when you are about to cross swords with one of the worlds deadliest assassins?
A: “You and I have unfinished business!”
 - Beatrix Kiddo (Uma Thurman) – Kill Bill

Q: What do you say when you are trying to talk someone into doing something both completely foolish and completely heroic?
A: “Ride out with me.”
 - Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen) – LOTR: Two Towers

Q: What do you say when you are headed to a party?  Any type of party, anywhere?
A: “Vegas baby!  Vegas!”
 - Trent (Vince Vaughn) – Swingers

Q: What do you ask when you find out you get to do something you both love and are exceptional, you might even say “super,” at?
A: “As fast as I can?”
 - Dash (Spencer Fox) – The Incredibles

Q: What do you say if someone asks if you know where you are going?
A: “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney.”
 - Dory (Ellen DeGeneres) – Finding Nemo

Q: What do you say when someone is trying to show-off but you are not impressed?
A: “That’s not a knife.”
 - Michael J. “Crocodile” Dundee (Paul Hogan) – Crocodile Dundee

Q: What do you say to someone who is bit too full of themselves?
A: ”This ain’t Dodge City.  And you ain’t Bill Hickok.”  
 - Mathew Quigley (Tom Selleck) – Quigley Down Under

This, along with the previous installments, are by no means complete lists, but they should be enough to get you through most of life’s experiences.  Well, I’ve found them useful anyway.

…..

*The Matticus Kingdom published this list for entertainment purposes only.  We do not dispense with advice we think people should ever heed and cannot be held responsible for any resulting slaps across the face, puzzled looks, loss of friends, tarnished reputation, improved reputation for that matter, closets that were once skeleton free no longer being so, or other unpleasantness that may result from following these guidelines.  Proceed at your own risk, here there be monsters.  Don’t try this at home kids.  Insert additional typical “hold harmless” verbiage here.   I keep waiting for someone to comment on all the silliness going on down here but so far noone has.  Maybe if I just keep making it longer and longer someone will finally notice it.  Hey, look down here, I’m funny!
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About djmatticus

Blah, blah, blah... I have no idea what this will end up being; we just have to wait and see where the words take us.
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63 Responses to Even More Q and A Parody Madness

  1. merbear74 says:

    I think you could do a weekly segment and still have plenty to choose from!!

  2. Where else can you find quotes from Quigley Down Under, (Tom Selleck who will always be Magnum to me), Finding Nemo, and the Two Towers in one place. Awesome quotes for a Friday. These always make me smile and laugh on the inside. Thanks Matticus.

  3. P Sherman in the house! Nice one. Also the Quigley Down Under one I think I’ll actually use. A lot. And Crocodile Dundee is my favorite movie ever.

    • djmatticus says:

      Crocodile Dundee is probably in my top ten… (though i think there are about 50 movies in my top ten, so I’m not sure what that says about me – apparently I’m not very good at math). I had originally wanted to use a different line from Finding Nemo, but I’m saving it for a different post.

  4. Amba says:

    This was hilarious. But your disclaimer was even funnier LOL! Thank you for prepping me for LIFE!

  5. Melanie says:

    The aforementioned warning was not heeded, but I didn’t try this at home, I tried it at work. No face-slapping occurred, however a tarnished reputation and an improved reputation resulted. I hold you harmless, but I hold you responsible for continued Q & A parodies.

    • djmatticus says:

      That is a responsibility I will gladly take ownership of. Thank you for holding me harmless (and reading my silly legalese and commenting)!

      • Melanie says:

        I’m a new follower and just read the series today, otherwise, you might not have had to wait so long. I enjoyed that from the second installment on.

      • djmatticus says:

        Awesome and welcome! Glad you enjoyed catching up today. Hopefully the continuing installments in the series will be just as good! *Disclaimer* – The Matticus Kingdom is full of silliness but we do not gaurantee any level of “goodness.”

      • Melanie says:

        There is no shortage of good movie quotes appropriate for throwing a regular conversation into good humor. To think otherwise would be inconceivable.

      • djmatticus says:

        You’ve only said it once – so I’m not sure if you do or don’t know what that word means yet. Besides, it’s Friday, and I’m not sure I’m up for a battle of the wits. I’m definitely not up for a battle of the wits to the death.

      • Melanie says:

        Inconceivable. Is there nothing better to do at work on a Friday than a blogger battle of the wits? Well…except maybe work and these emails keep coming in and interrupting me.

      • djmatticus says:

        On second thought – let’s not go to work, “’tis a silly place.”

      • Melanie says:

        Not your emails interrupting me, work emails interrupting my serious attempts to not work.

      • djmatticus says:

        Perish the thought. I didn’t think you were talking about emails from me… or really being worried at all about working. Now, i’m off to “save people I hate for reasons I don’t quite understand.”

      • Melanie says:

        Oh, good. I’m glad you didn’t jump on the “Jump to Conclusions mat” because I pretty much would have with that vague nonsense I wrote.

      • djmatticus says:

        No worries. I wouldn’t have wanted you to have to move your desk around or anything like that by jumping to conclusions. By the way, have you seen my stapler? Or, do you know where I can find “a man who know’s how to get things?”

      • Melanie says:

        Only if you “show me the money!”

      • djmatticus says:

        You had me at “show me the money!” And I will, show you the money that is, as long as you can tell me “Why is the rum gone?”

      • Melanie says:

        “Because we’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no great war. No great depression. Our great depression is our lives.”

      • djmatticus says:

        The first rule of a battle of the wits is – you do not cheat. And I just broke that rule. *for shame* You win. I had to look it up. It sounded sooooooo familiar – I just couldn’t place. Guess it’s time to watch it again. “I think it was the bear, growling inside him. Making him do bad things.”

      • Melanie says:

        Well, let’s call it a tie because the bear growling is a mystery to me.

      • djmatticus says:

        No, you still win, because I cheated and you did not. Took Brad Pitt from Fight Club and moved to another one of his movies… another one of my favorites.

      • Melanie says:

        I haven’t seen that movie in 18 years. That’s a real for-shame because it’s a good one. I know what I’m Netflix-ing tonight. Ahhhh…young Brad…me amore.

      • djmatticus says:

        Enjoy. ;-) Just not too much… I’m not even sure how that would work really, with the screen getting in the way and all…

  6. When asked how we deal with life?
    Just keep swimming!!!
    Dory on Finding Nemo

  7. jaschmehl says:

    Quigley Down Under? I can’t believe I’m not the only person in the world who’s seen that movie.
    :)

    Hey look down here… I’m funny too!

    • djmatticus says:

      What I don’t get is that more people aren’t aware of it and see it as the fine film that it is… drama, action, romance, comedy. It’s the full package. I mean, it even has Alan Rickman in it! Thanks for reading (all the way to the bottom), commenting and following!

  8. seeker says:

    Allow me to ask you the same question that I received from. What will be your answer?
    One life is enough? But to live again, and to live as something else would be an awfully big adventure. What would it be like to be an ant in a world of giant beings? What would it be like to be an eagle soaring above the world? What would it be like to be born on a different contient in a different time? There is so much that could be learned an experienced, how can once be enough?

    • djmatticus says:

      I’ll start by saying, I don’t want to ever give up this life for the reason behind most of those questions – there is always more to be experienced and enjoyed (even the tough times). I want to see it all and do it all. But, as death is part of life, I can hope that I get to come back as other things and experience this world through those incarnations and maybe in time I will get to see it all and do it all.

  9. The Hook says:

    DON’T stop the madness! Ever!

  10. likeitiz says:

    Enjoyed this again! More, please!

    What do you say to an annoying zealot of an organization you believe to be made of absolute scamming scumbags?
    “Let’s agree to disagree.”
    Boris the Animal, Men in Black 3

  11. jrosenberry1 says:

    These are brilliant! Glad you’re still posting. Think you’ll do it weekly?
    Here’s one for you … when someone is about to go shopping around the holidays or in crowds – or attend a festival, etc. – my family says, “you be careful out among the English” (out of “Witness” with Harrison Ford). (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Witness_(1985_film))

  12. sarahneeve says:

    I’m so glad you posted another exerpt. I’ve been waiting patiently, biding my time. Now, bring on next Friday. :D

  13. Pingback: Awards anyone? « My Rabbit Hole Trips

  14. AnnaDango says:

    Heyyo! I nominated you for The Liebster Award!

  15. Pingback: Award Ketchup « Inspire the Idea

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